advice on how to "save" your marriage...OR ODE TO THE TREE!

NOW that we have moved past thanksgiving, we are headed full force into the
christmas holidays. you know what that means?
It means putting up trees, lights, outdoor lights, decorations, etc.
I am not sure if YOUR husband is anything like MY husband, but the man LOATHES
(with a capital "L") doing these things.

I am not sure if it is the "scrooge" in him, or just revisiting all the ghosts of christmas past (i.e. decorations) that makes him crabby~!

It is probably a combination of both.

And so now the fun begins...we have all gotten a good nights sleep, recovered from hours of playing "mexican train" at grandma's, 80th birthday parties & thanksgiving dinner, we have recovered from a lack of sleep and the shopping mayham and we have brought the christmas boxes, from their dark recesses in the basement.

NOW, the fun starts!

I recall all the years in the past, hours spent playing holiday music, swearing and cursing under our breaths, and sometimes outloud (ok A LOT outloud) about putting up the tree and getting the lights "just right". (as in wrapped around the tree PERFECTLY with no dark spots when you squint your eyes to look at the tree, the lights HAD TO be "just so"....you all can pretend you don't know what I'm talking about, but I KNOW you do!)

It was an ODIOUS and tedious process from start to finish.

So let me tell you about THE "BLESSED EVENT" that happened last christmas....

after 16 YEARS of marriage.

ONE that SHOULD have happened 16 years ago!!

We were rolling in a small amount of extra dough (thanks to ebay "hot toy sales" for Dor...)

a RARE and glorious occassion during these, our newleywed, college years. (ok scratch the newleywed part!)

Rare, none the less!

All of a sudden we found ourselves strolling the aisles of costco, our cart empty. And WHO

has empty carts while strolling the aisles of Costco? Such SIN! Such Blasphemy!

It was then that we came across a TREE.

Not just ANY Tree. It was a PRELIT TREE. It was "THE" TREE!

IT was sparkley, and shiney and when you squinted your eyes and looked at it "just so", the lights were ALL perfectly spaced and glimmering! WHAT A TREE! It made us weak in our knees!

You know, the kind of TREE you snap together and PLUG IN all in one fail swoop???

YUP! that's the one.

After a (very) SHORT discussion and quick glance at the PAYPAL account, we snatched up

the VERY LAST (least expensive) PRELIT TREE!

We came home, and folks, in LESS THAN 5 MINUTES (yup 5 minutes) that puppy was up,

plugged in, and PERFECTLY LIT!

OH HAPPY DAY! Oh day without ONE CURSE WORD used! (well, not for the TREE at least!)

Oh how simple, and Oh how easy....

WHAT? pray tell...

had taken us SO LONG to discover the JOY of the "prelit tree" (well, an excess of cold hard cash was a big player in the equation!)

We put on our MOTAB Christmas CD and sang out the words of "JOY TO THE WORLD" with more feeling than one can imagine (ok, so that is a bold faced LIE, but we DID feel like rejoicing with the MOTAB! WHO WOULDN'T?)

So MY ADVICE, if YOU find yourself experiencing LESS than marital bliss while

putting up the Christmas tree.

If you find yourself answering any of these questions with a resounding YES!

Are you having trouble with your spouse while putting up what we lovingly refer to as the "Christmas Crap"?

Is it bringing out HIS, or your, foul and scrooge like disposition?

Are you finding yourself unneccessarily wrapped up in strings and strings of

christmas lights, with no place to wrap them? and no idea how?

IF SO, and you find yourself with some extra cash for the spending...

hurry to the nearest store that sells PRELITS and grab one of those trees!!!

it will turn HOURS of misery into 5 minutes of fun...and if you're LUCKY your

spouse REALLY WILL sing joyous songs of the season with you when you are DONE!

it worked for us, we thought we just had to share the best thing that ever happened

to OUR marriage at the holidays!

(LOL!)

the end!